March 16th, 2010
There Is Still Joy in Parenting–losing your life to find it.
Many know and follow the man who said ‘lose your life and only then will you find it’ without really knowing what it means. Today I experienced a bit of losing and finding. Today I did not put anything on the calendar. I did not try to desperately hang onto the life that I have always lived and become accustom. I did not follow my nature to cram a million things and people into 1 day. I did not follow how I was nurtured (by business and society) to be effective and efficient.
Instead I gave my life away to my children. I was fully (well as full as I get) present and experienced an answered prayer of “being” with my children instead of doing things with my children. So this is how it went.
With my daughter in the care of a friend, my son and I set out for the Cloisters and the beautiful gardens that surround it. Armed with a picnic, jasmin tea, a blanket and hunting gear we boarded the M4 uptown. You know what we found there? Nature… and it was glorious!
We kicked through fallen leaves
Picked up acorns and there tops
Meandered down tree lined paths with the Cloister tower as a backdrop
Collected sticks, leaves and flowers
Sat on a stone wall and watched the boats head north up the Hudson
Waved at birds, planes and joggers
Ate fruit strips
Rolled down a grassy knoll covered in clover
After picking up my baby girl from my friend’s house, we unloaded our bag of nature’s goodies. Since our new $5 rummage sale coffee table is craft friendly we sorted our stash and filled a large mason jar with the wonders of nature. Who knew that acorn tops make great hats and noses, especially on a 2 month old. Apparently acorns are also phones because my son talked on one all afternoon to an imaginary friend and even cleared his throat like I do while talking! We laughed and laughed.
Music class taught us a few things about impromtu dancing and playing so we used our sticks to bang to the beat of the Brazilian mix playing on the iPod shuffle. Soon the kids and I were chugging through the dining room to a “choo choo” song and using a yoga band to keep the train cars (our bodies) connected. We don’t need no stinkin’ music class–we have all we need with the elements of nature…and well, a $5 coffee table.
The afternoon turned into many many messes —so we spent an hour in the bathroom while Ander experimented with the bath to shower nozzle, drenching all 3 of us. Our baby girl stared and stared at her brother breaking into wide mouth grins every time he went off on one of us babble numbers. She excitedly responds to him as he was the primary voice she heard while incubating. Was that the water falling from the shower head or a tear on my cheek? Ah, life.
Today I let go of “my” life and in turn found more living, more joy, more abundance, more peace that I thought possible. Lose it, it’s worth it.
Guest Blogger, Tanya Springer Bishai, is a former marketer and incentive strategist who recently left corporate America to raise her 2 young children and hasn’t looked back. A firm believer that “an unexamined life isn’t worth living” (Socrates), she spends her time pondering how to shape her world to best love and nurture her husband, her children and her community. Once an adventure seeking junkie she is now channeling her obsession with global travel into planting roots in New York City. You can find her blogging here.
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